Last Day of 2011 and More Spotting

I could really do without the spotting. It's not a lot and it's definitely brown but it is still there. It came last night before I went to bed and then it pretty much stops. No cramping is included at all, so that makes me feel a little better. TMI here: When I put my suppositories in last night and this morning and I checked my cervix and if feels very, very soft. I had a leep done in 2006 so my cervix is cut diagonal. I am hoping this is where the spotting is coming from. I will remember for the next FET to get a PIO shots instead, I wonder if it's too late to switch now? I am not going to call CCRM but I am going to call my OB on Tuesday. I already have an appointment with them on Jan. 12 but I am so freaked out about this cervix.

I am grateful for everything that happened in 2011. There were many cancelled cycles, many shots and many tears but it is all worth it because we finally got our BFP. I am however, so ready for 2012 to be here. Each week of 2012 will bring us closer to meeting this little one. 

                                                      Happy New Year Everyone!

Today's Ultrasound!

HFS! Finally, we heard and saw a heartbeat! It was 126 bpm! I am in shock and totally relieved! The Dr. found the heart beat immediately. Everything is growing fine and he said the gestational sac was perfect. This little one was measured at 6week 6 days so one day ahead, which I am happy about!

So I guess I was freaked out for no reason. Well, the damn ER folks freaked me out way too much, oh and so did the bleeding and cramping. He said the bleeding was probably from the suppositories because he didn't find any source of the bleeding. I know I don't have the best cervix because I had a leep done in 2006.
So I am off to finally call my OB to let them know I am pregnant. I know we have a long ways to go but today was one step closer to where we need to be.

Thank you all for listening to my crazy journey and for really helping me through these last 2 weeks. I really appreciate all of the prayers!

6.4 week Lab Results

I am a little concerned that my Estradoil went down. I asked my nurse and she said it was fine that this number fluctuates a lot. Well, I think by now (6.4 weeks) it should be going up higher on it's own because I am pregnant. Concerning to say the least.

Estradoil: 436 (still on 4 vivelle patches, changing every other day)

Progesterone: 12.5 (3 prometrium suppositories vaginally daily)

One Day Closer

I woke up this morning to some more spotting when I went to the rest room. I couldn't believe it. I have been taking it really easy so I know it's not that. I felt great yesterday but the days before I had some light AF type cramping on and off. I don't think any of these are good signs. I didn't have any cramping yesterday and I don't today. The spotting is brownish this time at least. I keep hoping it's nothing and they will find a reason for the spotting tomorrow. Even it they don't find a reason and everything is growing normally and there is a heartbeat I am totally fine with the spotting. Tomorrow can't come soon enough for us. I am sick of waiting and just want to know one way or another what is going on. I keep thinking to myself this can't be happening. I wish I could have found an u/s place that is open today but no such luck. I am not going to the ER again.

                                         

                                                Hope everyone had a great Christmas! 

Possibly 6 weeks today?

I still feel pregnant so that is my motivation right now for me to think everything is going to be OK.  My boobs are crazy sore with many veins on them already. Also the smells I smell, I am not nausea but I and not hungry either. I literally have to force myself to eat 3 times a day. This morning my husband made me oatmeal and I couldn't eat it because it smelled like tuna.
Of course in the back of my mind I am prepared for the worst on Tuesday but right now I have to just hope and pray for the best. I pray all day long that God put his hands around this little one and helps it grow so someday I can put my arms around him or her.
I can't say things haven't been rough, of course I googled every word from the u/s I received when I went to the ER and having an irregular shaped gestational sac is not a good thing. But there were so many conflicting things from that report that I have just been trying to put it out of my head.
I know there are a lot of prayer going up to God right now from all out our immediate family members we told. They have all been through the entire process with us so they know everything that is going on. I tell me mom, dad and sisters everything, probably too much.
It's so amazing how much infertility affects so many people. My MIL called to tell me a story on the day I told her I had bleeding. She called her sister (about my bleeding/miscarriage scare) who was at a Shop.ko in Sou.th Dak.ota to tell her the news so they decided to pray together. Her sister stopped in an aisle in the store and prayed out loud with my MIL on the phone. Of course 2 people over heard her 1 man, 1 women, not a couple either. Both were or had someone they knew also going through infertility. The man and his wife did 11 IUI's and are moving on to IVF and the women's relative had IVF and now had a baby of her own. They both prayed for us too. The man even asked what our first names were so he could pray for us.
I pray everyone gets to hold their baby after infertility. I know, no matter what happens on Tuesday. We will be OK. We are prepared for whatever the outcome may be.

A Call From My Nurse

CCRM called this morning and asked how I was doing. I told them how much blood there was and almost everything else. The nurse told me you can get bleeding from doing to much and believe me I know I did way to much on Friday at work and Saturday morning. The nurse did seemed concerned but not to the point where they wanted to check anything. I asked about doing another beta test and she said the only thing they can do now is wait for the u/s. She said the earliest I could get in is Friday but Monday would be better. Of course everything is closed on 12/26. I said I could go Friday and she said that was still really early and if they didn't see anything I would have to go back again. I decided to just wait until 12/27, yes, I will go crazy between now and then but it's the best for results.
I did not tell my nurse I went to the ER and what the u/s said. I just couldn't since she told me it was too early for an ultrasound. I was told to call immediately if I have any more bleeding. I decided to call off sick from work today. I can't not tell you the last time I called in sick at work. Sure I have taken sick days due to IF treatments but I have not called in sick from work in 3 years.
I am going to try to have faith and hope for the best.  At least now I know I am totally prepared for the worst for my u/s. It feels better to be prepared.

No More Bleeding

Today I am feeling super sad. I keep crying off and on. I just can't control it. I have read tons of stories online with situations just like mine. Some turned out fine, some, not so fine. The bleeding has stopped completely, some brownish discharge but nothing else. I don't have any cramping. I still just continue to feel like AF is about to arrive any minute. I have been feeling like that since the 3dpt.
I wish I would have never had the u/s done at the ER yesterday. It's results are consuming my thoughts. I will need to somehow try to make it until Dec. 27th for my u/s with my local RE. I pray that everything looks normal. According to the ultrasound yesterday I have and enlarged yolk sac and the gestational sac is irregularly shaped. Both of those results usually end up in miscarriage. I know it's early on and sometimes this can still end up fine but it's hard to imagine that it will be fine for us. This wait is going to kill me.