Another 2WW

This time it really is a full 2 weeks possibly 2 weeks and a couple days. I am so nervous for the ultrasound. I am hoping and praying for a nice strong heartbeat. My mind thinks about it all day long. I am probably going to POAS a few times before the u/s sound I can confirm I am still pregnant. My mom and others  think I am crazy to be so worried but as we all know just because you are pregnant does not mean you are out of the woods yet. The day I hold our baby will be the day I will stop worrying about this pregnancy.
I know several have mentioned that my beta numbers are really high and there could possibly be twins. Here is my take on my high beta numbers. My opinion has no medical evidence, it's just how I feel. I transferred a 5AA, 6 day embryo, already hatching out of the shell.  I just think it implanted without any delay and it just kept on growing.  I know for sure we only transferred one. What if we did have a splitter? Well, we would be fine with that. We were not seeking twins in this process but if that happened naturally, we would be fine with that. I personally don't think that happened, I think there is only a less than 5% chance of that happening. I guess we will see next week!

Symptoms so far:
Sore boobs: Yes, they are sore and a lot fuller already. Husband hopes they stay this way. I do too, it's kinda nice.
Bloated: Ugh! I think it's because of the extra hormones (estrogen especially). My pants are already tight in the waist.
Cramping: I typically have AF type cramping, usually when I am walking around. It's not bad, it's actually kinda nice. It gives me hope that this little one is still growing.
Not Tired: I am not tired at all, in fact I wake up around 5am and can't get back to sleep and at night I am  not tired at all. I typically go to bed by 10pm, now it's past 11:30pm. I feel like it might be because of the lack of exercise.

Beta #2

First off I can't believe my result were ready at 9:41 this morning. I went in at 8am. I didn't even have to call and hound them to send the results, amazing. That is the first time this year I didn't have to freak out...finally.
Beta #2 is 1469. Sounds good to me. I haven't done much research on beta numbers, I have just read from other blogs that the first beta number needs to at least double by second beta time. I am just going to go with that and be happy today.
My ultrasound is scheduled on December 22nd. I will hopefully schedule it at 8am so I don't have to wait all day.

Pregnant!

I can hardly believe it! Well, I guess I can because when I look back at this past week I totally had all the symptoms and I still do!

My beta today was 391 so nice and strong!

I did POAS last night and it had 2 lines before I could even put the lid back on. We are beyond excited to get past this first hurdle. I know there are many more the next few weeks but right now I feel it's so not real.

Thanks again for your prayers, positive thoughts and wonderful comments!

Here is my pic from last night. My sister thinks I am weird for sharing it but I still am going to share!

Tomorrow Is Beta Day

It's been a hell of a road getting to tomorrow. Today I feel like I will be ok. I know I want this to work more than anything in the world but I think I am prepared for the worse. I plan on taking a test tonight. I have purchased pee tests and I decided that finding out together will be better than finding out at work, alone. Besides I guarantee the lab will mess up my STAT order as they always do. Thanks for all the positive thoughts, kind words and for cheering me on this year. I won't post until I hear my beta number so probably tomorrow afternoon sometime.

The Wait...

I was so confident while on bed rest in Colorado. I don't know what changed when I came home. I have been anxious and so nervous. I know it's not good to be like this, I just can't control it. I wish it was Saturday, on that day I will know the results and have a day off. I am too scared to POAS because I don't want to see only 1 line, I will be too scared to answer that 303 number on Thursday because I don't want to hear the words "You're Not Pregnant". I wish CCRM would just not call if it was negative I would be fine with that. I think hearing those words are going to be hard. I want to POAS the night before but I am just too scared to buy a test let alone pee on it. I told my family and friends that if they don't hear from me, it's not good news. I want to be more hopeful and positive right now so bad. I keep telling myself to be.
CCRM gave me a 60% chance at success so I feel like I can only try to be 60% positive. I know we transferred an amazing embryo but sometimes I don't think that matters.
Obviously this wait is not going well, this is the worse waiting I have ever done in my life. I know I will make it no matter what I am still praying and hoping for the best.

5dpt

After today I only have 4 more days to go. I have been very confident one minute that this worked and then not so much the next. I want to POAS so bad, I just keep telling myself to go buy one and just do it already, then I won't have to feel this worry anymore. Ugh, the mental battle I am having with myself is killing me. I was thinking about POAS on Thursday morning, the morning of beta day so when I get the call I will be prepared. I really can't imagine getting the call at work and not crying not matter what the result is. DH is dead set against that but he can be easily convinced. I also think the lab folk will mess up the results for me like they do every time I go there. 


I know many don't have any symptoms during the 2ww (9 days). But I just want to put it out there what I have had.


Symptoms: 1dpt & 2dpt: I didn't have much the first couple of days, just some light cramping in the uterus. It kinda felt like ovulation pain. Not strong at all.
3dpt: My breast are sore to touch. Sore lower back and tired quickly which I think both are related to bed rest.
4dpt: Super sore breasts, sore lower back and on/off AF type cramping but not as strong, super bloated. My entire body felt like I was run down, almost flu like but I am not sick.
5dpt: Sore breasts, not as sore as past days. Some of those AF type cramping again.


I know most of what I am feeling can and probably is due to the medications I am on, estrogen and progesterone. The week of Thanksgiving when I upped my estrogen I felt nauseous that entire week and my breast were super duper tender but the week of FET all of that went away. I can clearly not trust my body it is not my own. I just keep praying that this is working. 


After FET Medications: 
Vivelle (Estrogen, 4 patches) -changed every other day
Prometrium (Progesterone 200mg) -inserted vaginally 3x per day
Baby aspirin - one per day
Vitamin D supplement - one per night
Prenatal vitamins - one per night

Home Again

It's nice to be home again and relaxing on the coach. I am officially done with bed rest but I am still taking it easy. The embryo should have implanted by now and I sure hope it continues to dig in deep for the long haul. I hate that my mind can't stop thinking about what could possibly be going on in my uterus. I wish my body would give me some sort of sign that this really worked. I guess I will just have to wait until Thursday. I am not going to test before that day. I don't even own any pregnancy tests and haven't even purchased one of those in over a year so that part should be easy. I am sure I will have good days and bad days until beta day.